[Fic] For Always - 6/24
Mar. 13th, 2009 03:46 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
coley_merrinTitle: For Always
Author: Coley Merrin
Rating: PG-13
Pairings: Zhou Mi/Kyuhyun and Siwon/Hankyung (with possible additions)
Genre: AU. Drama/Romance/Angst/Fluff/The kitchen sink
Summary: The bookstore called "Soulmate" has been the most important thing in Kyuhyun's life. With it, he has built a fortress of brick and page around himself, one that can only be brought down from the inside -- both with love and with danger.
Hankyung has built a life of meaning, but finds no substance in it and lives in dreams. Dreams that, when they materialize, make him question his ability to reach and hold on when he wants nothing less.
***
Chapter One ** Chapter Two ** Chapter Three ** Chapter Four ** Chapter Five ** Chapter Six ** Chapter Seven
***
Chapter Six
***
The observation class for Siwon and Yunjee was set up in a tag team sort of way, each leaving messages with Kyuhyun until Siwon actually did show up, an excited child towing him behind. Having parents and children come in to see how things were wasn’t such an unusual thing to the other children, who had nothing but inquiring eyes for Yunjee. He unfortunately had eyes for Siwon, whose button-up shirt had two buttons undone and there was just the barest hint of collar bone...
Somehow he pushed it all out of his head, falling back into their usual routine with the children. The class ended as it usually did, with creative dance... Each child getting to act out some animal or story as everyone watched.
He saw Yunjee whispering frantically to Siwon during it, and smiled, turning back to the picking up process.
“How did you like class today?” he asked, coming over to sit on the floor in front of Yunjee. His co-teacher was ushering the last of the students to their parents.
“I liked it a lot!”
“Did you want to try doing what we did last? Dancing like an animal or...?”
“Yes! Oh, yes!”
He grinned, glad he hadn’t read that desire wrong, and stood with her.
“What do you want to be?”
“A butterfly!”
She took a few unsure steps before raising her arms, fluttering and soaring around him in a circle before raising both arms to the ceiling in her best interpretation of a landing butterfly.
“Like that?”
“Just like that. I think you need to be able to curtsy after a performance like that. Just like this.”
He demonstrated a curtsy and watched her cutely copy his moves.
“Go do that for your daddy, now.”
She catapulted toward Siwon and repeated the curtsy.
“Daddy, I did it!”
“You were wonderful, baby!” Siwon said, tossing her up in the air and hugging her tight, to the music of her delighted squeals.
“Can you twirl?” she asked Hankyung, hope written on every feature.
Twirl? Oh. He grinned and stepped back a bit, feeling his body lift and respond, the tight quick spin executed almost without thought.
She squealed again, clapping her hands, and he gave a very serious bow.
“Can you do something else?”
He thought for a moment before stepping closer to Siwon, using his shoulder as an impromptu barre, and absolutely having Yunjee coo with delight.
“You’re very sturdy, aren’t you?” he said, a teasing note in his voice before he made the mistake of looking up, catching sight of Siwon’s very round eyes.
He brought his hand away immediately, smiling instead at Yunjee as she wormed down out of Siwon’s arms.
“It takes time to be able to do those things, but it can be very fun. It’s a lot of fun learning how to do everything and meeting new friends. Talk with your daddy about it, okay?”
“I don’t know that we’ll be doing much talking,” Siwon said, watching her twirl happily around.
He allowed himself to share a smile.
***
“Yah, you don’t want to see me?!” Heechul said loudly as he exited the back room with an anxious Zhou Mi trotting behind him.
“I didn’t say that. You just... You should stop coming so much, Heechul. Don’t you have other things to do?”
Heechul grinned. “You really do like him a lot, Seasoning. I never knew.” He looked at Kyuhyun and his eyebrows rose. “Oh, if looks could kill.”
He waved at Kyuhyun who was doing his best to ignore the whole spectacle. He wasn’t going to bother to mention they were creating havoc in his store, as he turned away. There were no customers at the moment anyway. Two weeks ago he probably would have taken Zhou Mi’s head off. The guy should be thankful.
Zhou Mi sighed as the door closed, making a little sound of “Good riddance” that Kyuhyun secretly agreed with, but outwardly displayed none of. Zhou Mi must have spotted the disapproving look on Kyuhyun’s face.
“What?”
“You were pretty rude to your friend,” he said, wishing that he could have stayed silent. Speaking up made him look like he cared.
Zhou Mi stepped up close to the counter and leaned toward Kyuhyun.
“He was just trying to see... He wanted me to make him go.” Zhou Mi frowned at his hands. “I miss spending time with you.”
Kyuhyun stared at him, heart skipping at least one beat as the earnest face showed the sentiment in more than words.
“Don’t be stupid then. All you had to do was get him to leave before I locked up.”
Zhou Mi leaned in even further. “I could have stayed after?”
Kyuhyun inclined his chin and kept cleaning. His silence apparently said more than his words.
“Could I... The book of poetry bound in the black leather, would you mind if I took it to the university with me? I know you wanted me to ask, and you might not want any of them to leave, and that’s okay, but...”
“That’s fine.”
Indicating Zhou Mi could have stayed after apparently indicated that he would soften about other things, like the books. It made him a little ill, having said something so revealing to his personal feelings, that the books still had the final laugh.
***
Hankyung felt his muscles hum as he slid, bent, reached, leaped. As he struck his final pose, he sensed someone there, more than seeing. Somehow, as he turned to the open door. it did not shock him that it was Siwon.
“That was amazing,” Siwon said.
He caught his breath, letting eyes consume Siwon’s appearance as he picked up his towel. Siwon’s coat was over his arm, revealing the soft looking dark gray shirt that he wore.
“Thanks,” he said finally, walking closer without embarrassment at having been watched. “It needs some fine turning. Kyuhyun told you I was here?”
“No, I stopped by to sign Yunjee up for lessons, and thought to check and they sent me back.”
“Oh good! I think she’ll really enjoy it. Some kids lose enthusiasm or are forced into it by their parents, but some really genuinely do have the best experiences of their lives with dance.”
“I think half of her anticipation is dancing and half of it is seeing you,” Siwon said, dimples flashing.
“Now you know my secret of getting more customers!”
Siwon laughed and that same warmth spread through him.
“Where is Yunjee, anyway?”
“With my parents. Every so often they have time, and they like to spend time with her.”
“That’s good. What about you? No lessons for you?”
“Oh, I can’t dance,” Siwon said, gesturing his denial.
“Haven’t tried?
“Partly.”
“It’s great exercise, tones muscles,”Hankyung said, and set his bag on the chair.
“I think I’m used to a different kind of workout.”
Yes, he thought. He had witnessed that. Being a little curbside stalker like he was.
“There’s little that’s natural about ballet. Our bodies weren’t designed to do what we ask it to do. But we can train it. Children’s bodies are still moldable.”
“So there’s no hope for me.”
“Anyone can become more flexible. You have wonderful posture. I wish half the students could be more like you. Are you sure you can’t dance?”
Siwon laughed a little wryly. “No, hardly. Not like you. I was forced to take ballroom dancing lessons, a couple of them, as a teenager, but that’s really all.”
“Like waltzing and stuff?”
“Yep, waltzing.” He slid his left foot forward in almost instinctual memory. “I guess that’s not something you forget easily.”
“Show me.”
He tugged Siwon’s coat from his hands, draping it over the chair. And then he stepped closer, hoping he didn’t smell as ripe as he feared, and completely unable to care if it meant touching Siwon, being close to Siwon. And the same’s eyes widened, clearly coming out of some dancing memory.
“What?”
“Show me! You’ve seen me dance...” He guided Siwon’s hand to his waist. “I promise, I can follow a three beat waltz.”
“Um.” Siwon swallowed, staring in the approximate location of Hankyung’s right ear as their hands slipped together, and Hankyung’s opposite hand rested lightly near his shoulder. They waited, still and silent for the space of three heartbeats before Siwon chuckled.
“Right, I lead.”
And he slid them into an even, if tense, rhythm. One two three. One two three. Back side slide, front side slide... It was as easy as breathing, as natural as it. Siwon had an innate rhythm, one that was impeded somewhat by nerves or performance anxiety one. He could imagine them continuing with the unheard music, loosing their hands and sliding his arms around Siwon, tucking himself just so against him, that strong neck. Siwon’s hair was growing just a bit shaggy at the ends, and his hands itched to touch. But it would definitely cause more problems than solving them if he were to do that.
Their chests bumped as Siwon stumbled just slightly, barely missing toes in the process.
“See? Not a dancer,” he said, laughing into Hankyung’s ear.
“You did fine.” He was hyper aware of the pulse he could see jumping in Siwon’s throat, the hand that cupped his elbow. And that he needed to shower and badly. “I shouldn’t take up all of your time, though.”
“Are you hungry? Maybe we could get something to eat,” Siwon asked almost urgently.
It was such a bad idea, and he was completely incapable of saying no.
“I’m starving. If you give me just a few minutes, I’ll shower and we can go?”
Perhaps he could drown himself in the shower, rather than face that eager smile. He was too desperate, and Siwon too nice... It brought them together far more than was safe.
***
Kyuhyun, of course, wanted to know everything. He could not keep his mouth shut by any means, when it included Siwon.
“What did you talk about?”
“Oh, you know. Weather, the trees… the meaning of life.”
“So, how many dates does that make?”
He blinked at Kyuhyun. “Don’t dates become dates when the participants say so? Because that was definitely not a date by name.”
“He ate, you ate, you ate together in the same place alone by invitation.”
It had been a tiny little cafe, at a table with barely enough room for all of their knees to fit under. He had picked at his fruit salad and listened and dreamed as Siwon had spoke of his family and his job. His heart had been in his throat when Siwon had touched his hand, had calmed only slightly by the second and third times. Siwon, it seemed, liked to touch. He had just run away too quickly before to notice.
“It was just a meal. He’s really nice, Kyuhyun. He’s friendly. Friends do that.”
“Did he pay?”
“We split it.”
“Okay. But friends don’t typically waltz together like they’re reenacting Sleeping Beauty.”
“I made him. It’s not like he said he wanted to dance with me.”
“You think most men would be okay with that? Don’t you dare tell me he’s nice one more time. He’s seeking you out. I don’t know why this only makes sense to me.”
It didn’t just make sense to Kyuhyun. It made a decent amount of sense to Hankyung as well. But the fact that he wanted it so much meant he couldn’t trust his own judgement. And that made trusting Kyuhyun’s hard as well.
***
Yunjee had been in class all of twice when Hankyung had a surprise visitor. He had laughed when he saw the door open, and shuffled a chair over. The love of his life had come to watch.
Class went smoothly, only a tiny hiccup when one of the youngest was overzealous in want of attention. Considering, this age could bring smiles one moment and tears the next. He kept an eye out for Siwon as the room was picked up of mats and children filed out with their parents. He held out his hand to Yunjee.
“There’s someone I’d like you to meet.”
She peered with interest at the lady who had been sitting and watching their class.
“Is she your girlfriend?” she asked.
He laughed. “No, my mama.”
“Oh!”
His mother smiled at they approached.
“”Mama, this is Yunjee. Yunjee, this is my mother.”
Still in ballet mode, Yunjee executed a cute little curtsy.
“Hello! Nice to meet you!”
“Nice to meet you too, Yunjee. Do you like ballet?”
“I do.” She pulled on Hankyung’s hand. “She talks like you.”
“She was born in China, too. Could you excuse me a minute?” he said to his mother.
“Of course, baby.”
He heard Yunjee giggle as he walked away. “He’s not a baby.”
“He still is mine,” his mother replied.
He was out of range when he spotted Siwon enter.
“I’m sorry I’m late,” he said, smiling sheepishly. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine. I’m always here after,anyway, so you don’t have to worry. Is everything okay?”
Siwon sighed and stuffed his hands into his pockets. “My sister... Yes. Everything is okay. Just frustrating.”
“I hope it will all be all right.”
Siwon smiled at him and his heart ached. “It will be.”
Siwon looked with interest as Yunjee arrived, towing his mother behind her.
“Daddy! Daddy!”
Hankyung laughed, taking his mother’s hand.
“Siwon, I’d like you to meet my mother. Mama, this is Choi Siwon, Yunjee’s father.”
Siwon was clearly surprised, but he was all polite gentleman, bowing.
“She can’t be your mother,” he said, touching Hankyung’s forearm. “You can’t have a mother this young.”
“Stop calling me old,” he joked.
“I like this one,” his mother said in Mandarin. “You should keep him.”
Siwon’s eyes widened and he cursed himself as his face flamed.
“Mama, Siwon can speak, too.”
“Good!” she said, smiling brightly at Siwon who, of course, smiled back. “Your daughter is very cute and well mannered.”
“Thank you.”
“Cute? Daddy, am I cute?” Yunjee asked, clearly picking up on some of the conversation to both he and his mother’s entertainment.
“Very,” Siwon said in Korean, lifting her up.
His mother smirked at him, seeming to say Keep this one for sure.
Hankyung got a strange feeling as he watched his mother and Siwon talk. Someone he loved so dearly with someone he struggled not to.
“Geng should bring you by to eat at my restaurant,” she said before Siwon could leave. “I’d love to have you and your daughter there.”
“I’d like that,” Siwon said, sending Hankyung a very “that’s up to you” type look over her head. He really didn’t see what choice he had. His mother would only remind him of it until he did.
“Do you like dumplings?” she asked Yunjee.
“Yes!”
He smiled helplessly at Siwon. Plans would be made.
***
He really had no idea what kind of trouble he was getting into bringing his mother to the bookstore right after that. In retrospect, he should have. She told Kyuhyun all about their meeting with Siwon and his daughter, how handsome Siwon was, and why couldn’t Hankyung find someone like that?
Kyuhyun sent him a strange look, before turning back to his mother.
“Mama... Did he not tell you...? Siwon isn’t married... He and Hankyung have been spending a lot of time together, and Hankyung is trying to run away from him.”
“He’s not married?”
“No!” Kyuhyun said, with relish, enough so that Hankyung felt the urge to reach over and push him down.
“Han Geng!”
He winced. Not good.
“You mean to tell me you want to deprive me of that precious girl as a grandchild?”
“Mama.”
“Don’t “mama” me,” she scolded.
“You want a grandchild more than my happiness?”
“Do you love him?”
His heart churned. He couldn’t help but answer his mother. And though his brain cells were intact more often than not of late... “...I think so,” he whispered.
“Then what is your problem?”
Kyuhyun laugh was loud and obvious. “Thank you! I’ve been wondering that, too.”
“Tell me, Kyuhyun. Doesn’t Siwon like him back?”
“From all I know.”
“And they’re still dancing around? Men. You’re a smart one, Kyuhyun. Don’t be stupid like these two.”
He narrowed his eyes at Kyuhyun. Don’t make me mention Zhou Mi.
“You have to bring them to the restaurant for sure now,” she said, punching his arm with a mother’s love. “I’ll put extra in his his dumplings. He’ll have to keep you just for my food.”
He groaned. “Mama.”
“Take Zhou Mi with you if you don’t want to go alone,” Kyuhyun suggested. “He might like to have real Chinese food.”
“Zhou Mi?” his mother asked.
Oh, you put your foot in it now, Hankyung thought. And grinned.
“He can come... If you do, too. Ask him.”
***
He put off asking Zhou Mi for as long as possible. Until Hankyung returned and refused to leave until Kyuhyun had an answer.
Hankyung thought he was very clever, Kyuhyun mused as he sank into his reading chair. It was not his usual break time, so Zhou Mi’s raised eyebrow was to be expected. That and he was sure there was a sour expression on his face. This was uncomfortably like a date invitation, and that was so totally not what it was.
“I just want you to know that this invitation isn’t from me,” Kyuhyun said, leading with a disclaimer.
Zhou Mi tilted his head. “Okay?”
“Hankyung’s mother owns a restaurant across town, Chinese, authentic, and she’s making him bring Siwon. So I told him you should go too, if you were wanting the real thing anyway. I think they’re going next week. So. If you wanted to go, you could.”
Zhou Mi considered that a moment. “Are you going too?”
“Does that really make a difference?” he asked, suspicious.
“...A little. I don’t know Hankyung or Siwon very well, so wouldn’t it be weird for it to be just me?”
Well, if he put it that way. That would be awkward.
“I am going. Just so you know it’s not “them” and “us,” we’re just all going together. And you don’t know me very well, either.”
“I know more every day. You hum when you’re shelving.”
“I...what?”
“When I went out to get lunch yesterday, you were in the children’s section and you were humming. You sounded really good. I bet you sound amazing when you sing.”
He kind of wanted to brush the hair out of Zhou Mi’s eyes right then.
“I don’t know what you’d be able to know from me humming.”
“It was in tune... And your speaking voice is so nice... Maybe one day when you’re on your break, you could read to me instead.”
“That wouldn’t be much of a break, would it?”
Zhou Mi simply smiled.
“When are you bringing back that book you borrowed, anyway?”
“I brought that book back days ago, Kui Xian.”
“I didn’t know.”
“You wouldn’t let me tell you.”
He vaguely recalled Zhou Mi attempting to bring something up before Kyuhyun had turned to leave.
“Was Heechul happy to see you?”
Zhou Mi stared. “Heechul? Heechul was busy working and escorting his girlfriend. I didn’t go to visit him.”
Girlfriend? Heechul had a girlfriend?
“He is a flirt, but he is quite devoted,” Zhou Mi explained.
Well, that meant his question came out sounding a bit too far on the side of jealousy rather than curiosity. Even with Heechul gone he had been reluctant to return to the back room for his breaks. Perhaps he should have been grateful to Heechul. It was a week of the time Zhou Mi had with the books, a week that kept him from encouraging his way onto the slippery ground that was Zhou Mi’s presence. How much longer would he be there? A couple of weeks? A month? And when he had asked for that book...
“Will you come back on your break?” Zhou Mi asked, voice light but serious.
“I’ll be later than usual.”
“I’ll be here.”
He smiled at Kyuhyun, and this time it reached his eyes. They wouldn’t talk... He had discovered the danger of that. If Zhou Mi wanted to read to him, he would be content looking forward to that.
Hankyung was all but dancing in place at the counter waiting for him when he returned.
“So? Will he come?”
“Sounds like. Just let me know when you decide to go.”
“Sure. You can ask Siwon, though, when he comes in. Whenever is a good day for him.”
He peered over Hankyung’s shoulder and spotted Siwon himself, who peered in the wide windows and grinned before hurrying to the door.
“Ask him yourself.”
Hankyung bowed his head. “Not again.”
“Don’t be a moron. Hey, Siwon.”
“Hey...” Siwon turned with all sorts of hope toward Hankyung. “I’m going to pick up Yunjee at school. Will you come with me?”
Kyuhyun had to turn away to keep from laughing at Hankyung’s face. “I… sure.”
“Great! I’m going to steal Han Geng!” Siwon said to Kyuhyun.
Kyuhyun grinned, sobered. “Make sure you bring him back in one piece,” he said sternly.
He wondered that Siwon would laugh, but his hand was on Hankyung’s back and guiding him through the open door, and walking close, close enough for their arms to brush, as they went together down the street. Hankyung had at least wiped the “I’ve been struck by lightning” expression off of his face.
***
“So?” Kyuhyun demanded from behind the counter. Hankyung had returned just before he was ready to lock up.
“So?”
“So how was it?”
Hankyung sighed and pulled himself crossways into the chair, letting his head and legs drape languidly over the plush arms.
“I thought I told him to return you in one piece,” Kyuhyun said slyly. “And yet you’re about to ooze into twos and threes on the floor.”
“She held both our hands on the way back.”
“Aww.”
“We had ice cream…”
“In December?”
“She begged…”
“And used you shamelessly to appeal to Siwon, didn’t she?”
Hankyung’s head rose. “How did you know?”
“I have eyes in my head and more than two brain cells. Yours are unfortunately lost for the present. Since you’re going to tell me anyway…”
“He wiped my mouth with a napkin.”
Kyuhyun felt his stomach tremble. No, he didn’t want that with either of these two, but he wanted that… That easy familiarity, that wonderful closeness that spoke of affection. How did you find it? You could not put an ad in for it on the internet. It just happened. It was not magic, but it was close. And he didn’t have it.
“Mistaking you for another of his children already? You move fast.”
“Ha. Ha.”
“Here’s some advice since you’re melting all over my furniture: Next time he tries to wipe your mouth with paper, be sure to point to it and tell him you know something better you’d like there, like, you know, his.”
“Not in front of her!”
“Of course not… Just make sure you’re alone next time you’re being sloppy.”
“I don’t know what to do.”
“Of course you do,” Kyuhyun said, coming around so he could sit on the table and pat Hankyung’s shoulder. “You be yourself, just like you have been. He clearly hasn’t run away, so you must be doing something right. Seeing you’re here all but breaks his face already.”
He was pulled into a tight hug, and he squeezed back.
“And you should see your face, you know,” Kyuhyun said, poking him.
“I don’t make any weird expressions.”
“No, you just go a bit moony is all.”
“I’m scared out of my mind and so happy I could scream. I don’t know what that means.”
“Means it’s worth it.”
He didn’t bother telling him that for every ounce of fear Hankyung had, Siwon surely had two, because anyone who knew them or not could surely see the little girl’s attachment for Hankyung growing with every meeting. Hankyung knew, could surely see that. And he cared too much for Siwon, for Yunjee, for that not to be a concern of his as well. He wouldn’t want to hurt himself, but to hurt a child?
Zhou Mi’s quiet throat clearing from the door was as subtle as a slap to the face. He had clearly been waiting to leave for a while and was too polite to leave without saying goodbye.
“I… I’m sorry. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Hey, Zhou Mi,” Hankyung said, gripping Kyuhyun’s shoulder a little tighter as he sat up straight. “Kyuhyun is hungry. You should take him to get something.”
Kyuhyun stared at Hankyung. “I… what?”
“For calling me sloppy,” he whispered with a bright smile.
He didn’t know what it was. Their discussion? The fact that Zhou Mi wasn’t smiling in his face and asking him to go… Something made Kyuhyun turn toward Zhou Mi, the word “okay” nearly out of his mouth when Zhou Mi shook his head.
“Maybe another time. Good night, Han Geng. Kui Xian.”
And with a bob of his head, he was out the door.
It made the sting lessen, when he saw Hankyung’s face was as startled as he felt.
Author: Coley Merrin
Rating: PG-13
Pairings: Zhou Mi/Kyuhyun and Siwon/Hankyung (with possible additions)
Genre: AU. Drama/Romance/Angst/Fluff/The kitchen sink
Summary: The bookstore called "Soulmate" has been the most important thing in Kyuhyun's life. With it, he has built a fortress of brick and page around himself, one that can only be brought down from the inside -- both with love and with danger.
Hankyung has built a life of meaning, but finds no substance in it and lives in dreams. Dreams that, when they materialize, make him question his ability to reach and hold on when he wants nothing less.
***
Chapter One ** Chapter Two ** Chapter Three ** Chapter Four ** Chapter Five ** Chapter Six ** Chapter Seven
***
Chapter Six
***
The observation class for Siwon and Yunjee was set up in a tag team sort of way, each leaving messages with Kyuhyun until Siwon actually did show up, an excited child towing him behind. Having parents and children come in to see how things were wasn’t such an unusual thing to the other children, who had nothing but inquiring eyes for Yunjee. He unfortunately had eyes for Siwon, whose button-up shirt had two buttons undone and there was just the barest hint of collar bone...
Somehow he pushed it all out of his head, falling back into their usual routine with the children. The class ended as it usually did, with creative dance... Each child getting to act out some animal or story as everyone watched.
He saw Yunjee whispering frantically to Siwon during it, and smiled, turning back to the picking up process.
“How did you like class today?” he asked, coming over to sit on the floor in front of Yunjee. His co-teacher was ushering the last of the students to their parents.
“I liked it a lot!”
“Did you want to try doing what we did last? Dancing like an animal or...?”
“Yes! Oh, yes!”
He grinned, glad he hadn’t read that desire wrong, and stood with her.
“What do you want to be?”
“A butterfly!”
She took a few unsure steps before raising her arms, fluttering and soaring around him in a circle before raising both arms to the ceiling in her best interpretation of a landing butterfly.
“Like that?”
“Just like that. I think you need to be able to curtsy after a performance like that. Just like this.”
He demonstrated a curtsy and watched her cutely copy his moves.
“Go do that for your daddy, now.”
She catapulted toward Siwon and repeated the curtsy.
“Daddy, I did it!”
“You were wonderful, baby!” Siwon said, tossing her up in the air and hugging her tight, to the music of her delighted squeals.
“Can you twirl?” she asked Hankyung, hope written on every feature.
Twirl? Oh. He grinned and stepped back a bit, feeling his body lift and respond, the tight quick spin executed almost without thought.
She squealed again, clapping her hands, and he gave a very serious bow.
“Can you do something else?”
He thought for a moment before stepping closer to Siwon, using his shoulder as an impromptu barre, and absolutely having Yunjee coo with delight.
“You’re very sturdy, aren’t you?” he said, a teasing note in his voice before he made the mistake of looking up, catching sight of Siwon’s very round eyes.
He brought his hand away immediately, smiling instead at Yunjee as she wormed down out of Siwon’s arms.
“It takes time to be able to do those things, but it can be very fun. It’s a lot of fun learning how to do everything and meeting new friends. Talk with your daddy about it, okay?”
“I don’t know that we’ll be doing much talking,” Siwon said, watching her twirl happily around.
He allowed himself to share a smile.
***
“Yah, you don’t want to see me?!” Heechul said loudly as he exited the back room with an anxious Zhou Mi trotting behind him.
“I didn’t say that. You just... You should stop coming so much, Heechul. Don’t you have other things to do?”
Heechul grinned. “You really do like him a lot, Seasoning. I never knew.” He looked at Kyuhyun and his eyebrows rose. “Oh, if looks could kill.”
He waved at Kyuhyun who was doing his best to ignore the whole spectacle. He wasn’t going to bother to mention they were creating havoc in his store, as he turned away. There were no customers at the moment anyway. Two weeks ago he probably would have taken Zhou Mi’s head off. The guy should be thankful.
Zhou Mi sighed as the door closed, making a little sound of “Good riddance” that Kyuhyun secretly agreed with, but outwardly displayed none of. Zhou Mi must have spotted the disapproving look on Kyuhyun’s face.
“What?”
“You were pretty rude to your friend,” he said, wishing that he could have stayed silent. Speaking up made him look like he cared.
Zhou Mi stepped up close to the counter and leaned toward Kyuhyun.
“He was just trying to see... He wanted me to make him go.” Zhou Mi frowned at his hands. “I miss spending time with you.”
Kyuhyun stared at him, heart skipping at least one beat as the earnest face showed the sentiment in more than words.
“Don’t be stupid then. All you had to do was get him to leave before I locked up.”
Zhou Mi leaned in even further. “I could have stayed after?”
Kyuhyun inclined his chin and kept cleaning. His silence apparently said more than his words.
“Could I... The book of poetry bound in the black leather, would you mind if I took it to the university with me? I know you wanted me to ask, and you might not want any of them to leave, and that’s okay, but...”
“That’s fine.”
Indicating Zhou Mi could have stayed after apparently indicated that he would soften about other things, like the books. It made him a little ill, having said something so revealing to his personal feelings, that the books still had the final laugh.
***
Hankyung felt his muscles hum as he slid, bent, reached, leaped. As he struck his final pose, he sensed someone there, more than seeing. Somehow, as he turned to the open door. it did not shock him that it was Siwon.
“That was amazing,” Siwon said.
He caught his breath, letting eyes consume Siwon’s appearance as he picked up his towel. Siwon’s coat was over his arm, revealing the soft looking dark gray shirt that he wore.
“Thanks,” he said finally, walking closer without embarrassment at having been watched. “It needs some fine turning. Kyuhyun told you I was here?”
“No, I stopped by to sign Yunjee up for lessons, and thought to check and they sent me back.”
“Oh good! I think she’ll really enjoy it. Some kids lose enthusiasm or are forced into it by their parents, but some really genuinely do have the best experiences of their lives with dance.”
“I think half of her anticipation is dancing and half of it is seeing you,” Siwon said, dimples flashing.
“Now you know my secret of getting more customers!”
Siwon laughed and that same warmth spread through him.
“Where is Yunjee, anyway?”
“With my parents. Every so often they have time, and they like to spend time with her.”
“That’s good. What about you? No lessons for you?”
“Oh, I can’t dance,” Siwon said, gesturing his denial.
“Haven’t tried?
“Partly.”
“It’s great exercise, tones muscles,”Hankyung said, and set his bag on the chair.
“I think I’m used to a different kind of workout.”
Yes, he thought. He had witnessed that. Being a little curbside stalker like he was.
“There’s little that’s natural about ballet. Our bodies weren’t designed to do what we ask it to do. But we can train it. Children’s bodies are still moldable.”
“So there’s no hope for me.”
“Anyone can become more flexible. You have wonderful posture. I wish half the students could be more like you. Are you sure you can’t dance?”
Siwon laughed a little wryly. “No, hardly. Not like you. I was forced to take ballroom dancing lessons, a couple of them, as a teenager, but that’s really all.”
“Like waltzing and stuff?”
“Yep, waltzing.” He slid his left foot forward in almost instinctual memory. “I guess that’s not something you forget easily.”
“Show me.”
He tugged Siwon’s coat from his hands, draping it over the chair. And then he stepped closer, hoping he didn’t smell as ripe as he feared, and completely unable to care if it meant touching Siwon, being close to Siwon. And the same’s eyes widened, clearly coming out of some dancing memory.
“What?”
“Show me! You’ve seen me dance...” He guided Siwon’s hand to his waist. “I promise, I can follow a three beat waltz.”
“Um.” Siwon swallowed, staring in the approximate location of Hankyung’s right ear as their hands slipped together, and Hankyung’s opposite hand rested lightly near his shoulder. They waited, still and silent for the space of three heartbeats before Siwon chuckled.
“Right, I lead.”
And he slid them into an even, if tense, rhythm. One two three. One two three. Back side slide, front side slide... It was as easy as breathing, as natural as it. Siwon had an innate rhythm, one that was impeded somewhat by nerves or performance anxiety one. He could imagine them continuing with the unheard music, loosing their hands and sliding his arms around Siwon, tucking himself just so against him, that strong neck. Siwon’s hair was growing just a bit shaggy at the ends, and his hands itched to touch. But it would definitely cause more problems than solving them if he were to do that.
Their chests bumped as Siwon stumbled just slightly, barely missing toes in the process.
“See? Not a dancer,” he said, laughing into Hankyung’s ear.
“You did fine.” He was hyper aware of the pulse he could see jumping in Siwon’s throat, the hand that cupped his elbow. And that he needed to shower and badly. “I shouldn’t take up all of your time, though.”
“Are you hungry? Maybe we could get something to eat,” Siwon asked almost urgently.
It was such a bad idea, and he was completely incapable of saying no.
“I’m starving. If you give me just a few minutes, I’ll shower and we can go?”
Perhaps he could drown himself in the shower, rather than face that eager smile. He was too desperate, and Siwon too nice... It brought them together far more than was safe.
***
Kyuhyun, of course, wanted to know everything. He could not keep his mouth shut by any means, when it included Siwon.
“What did you talk about?”
“Oh, you know. Weather, the trees… the meaning of life.”
“So, how many dates does that make?”
He blinked at Kyuhyun. “Don’t dates become dates when the participants say so? Because that was definitely not a date by name.”
“He ate, you ate, you ate together in the same place alone by invitation.”
It had been a tiny little cafe, at a table with barely enough room for all of their knees to fit under. He had picked at his fruit salad and listened and dreamed as Siwon had spoke of his family and his job. His heart had been in his throat when Siwon had touched his hand, had calmed only slightly by the second and third times. Siwon, it seemed, liked to touch. He had just run away too quickly before to notice.
“It was just a meal. He’s really nice, Kyuhyun. He’s friendly. Friends do that.”
“Did he pay?”
“We split it.”
“Okay. But friends don’t typically waltz together like they’re reenacting Sleeping Beauty.”
“I made him. It’s not like he said he wanted to dance with me.”
“You think most men would be okay with that? Don’t you dare tell me he’s nice one more time. He’s seeking you out. I don’t know why this only makes sense to me.”
It didn’t just make sense to Kyuhyun. It made a decent amount of sense to Hankyung as well. But the fact that he wanted it so much meant he couldn’t trust his own judgement. And that made trusting Kyuhyun’s hard as well.
***
Yunjee had been in class all of twice when Hankyung had a surprise visitor. He had laughed when he saw the door open, and shuffled a chair over. The love of his life had come to watch.
Class went smoothly, only a tiny hiccup when one of the youngest was overzealous in want of attention. Considering, this age could bring smiles one moment and tears the next. He kept an eye out for Siwon as the room was picked up of mats and children filed out with their parents. He held out his hand to Yunjee.
“There’s someone I’d like you to meet.”
She peered with interest at the lady who had been sitting and watching their class.
“Is she your girlfriend?” she asked.
He laughed. “No, my mama.”
“Oh!”
His mother smiled at they approached.
“”Mama, this is Yunjee. Yunjee, this is my mother.”
Still in ballet mode, Yunjee executed a cute little curtsy.
“Hello! Nice to meet you!”
“Nice to meet you too, Yunjee. Do you like ballet?”
“I do.” She pulled on Hankyung’s hand. “She talks like you.”
“She was born in China, too. Could you excuse me a minute?” he said to his mother.
“Of course, baby.”
He heard Yunjee giggle as he walked away. “He’s not a baby.”
“He still is mine,” his mother replied.
He was out of range when he spotted Siwon enter.
“I’m sorry I’m late,” he said, smiling sheepishly. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine. I’m always here after,anyway, so you don’t have to worry. Is everything okay?”
Siwon sighed and stuffed his hands into his pockets. “My sister... Yes. Everything is okay. Just frustrating.”
“I hope it will all be all right.”
Siwon smiled at him and his heart ached. “It will be.”
Siwon looked with interest as Yunjee arrived, towing his mother behind her.
“Daddy! Daddy!”
Hankyung laughed, taking his mother’s hand.
“Siwon, I’d like you to meet my mother. Mama, this is Choi Siwon, Yunjee’s father.”
Siwon was clearly surprised, but he was all polite gentleman, bowing.
“She can’t be your mother,” he said, touching Hankyung’s forearm. “You can’t have a mother this young.”
“Stop calling me old,” he joked.
“I like this one,” his mother said in Mandarin. “You should keep him.”
Siwon’s eyes widened and he cursed himself as his face flamed.
“Mama, Siwon can speak, too.”
“Good!” she said, smiling brightly at Siwon who, of course, smiled back. “Your daughter is very cute and well mannered.”
“Thank you.”
“Cute? Daddy, am I cute?” Yunjee asked, clearly picking up on some of the conversation to both he and his mother’s entertainment.
“Very,” Siwon said in Korean, lifting her up.
His mother smirked at him, seeming to say Keep this one for sure.
Hankyung got a strange feeling as he watched his mother and Siwon talk. Someone he loved so dearly with someone he struggled not to.
“Geng should bring you by to eat at my restaurant,” she said before Siwon could leave. “I’d love to have you and your daughter there.”
“I’d like that,” Siwon said, sending Hankyung a very “that’s up to you” type look over her head. He really didn’t see what choice he had. His mother would only remind him of it until he did.
“Do you like dumplings?” she asked Yunjee.
“Yes!”
He smiled helplessly at Siwon. Plans would be made.
***
He really had no idea what kind of trouble he was getting into bringing his mother to the bookstore right after that. In retrospect, he should have. She told Kyuhyun all about their meeting with Siwon and his daughter, how handsome Siwon was, and why couldn’t Hankyung find someone like that?
Kyuhyun sent him a strange look, before turning back to his mother.
“Mama... Did he not tell you...? Siwon isn’t married... He and Hankyung have been spending a lot of time together, and Hankyung is trying to run away from him.”
“He’s not married?”
“No!” Kyuhyun said, with relish, enough so that Hankyung felt the urge to reach over and push him down.
“Han Geng!”
He winced. Not good.
“You mean to tell me you want to deprive me of that precious girl as a grandchild?”
“Mama.”
“Don’t “mama” me,” she scolded.
“You want a grandchild more than my happiness?”
“Do you love him?”
His heart churned. He couldn’t help but answer his mother. And though his brain cells were intact more often than not of late... “...I think so,” he whispered.
“Then what is your problem?”
Kyuhyun laugh was loud and obvious. “Thank you! I’ve been wondering that, too.”
“Tell me, Kyuhyun. Doesn’t Siwon like him back?”
“From all I know.”
“And they’re still dancing around? Men. You’re a smart one, Kyuhyun. Don’t be stupid like these two.”
He narrowed his eyes at Kyuhyun. Don’t make me mention Zhou Mi.
“You have to bring them to the restaurant for sure now,” she said, punching his arm with a mother’s love. “I’ll put extra in his his dumplings. He’ll have to keep you just for my food.”
He groaned. “Mama.”
“Take Zhou Mi with you if you don’t want to go alone,” Kyuhyun suggested. “He might like to have real Chinese food.”
“Zhou Mi?” his mother asked.
Oh, you put your foot in it now, Hankyung thought. And grinned.
“He can come... If you do, too. Ask him.”
***
He put off asking Zhou Mi for as long as possible. Until Hankyung returned and refused to leave until Kyuhyun had an answer.
Hankyung thought he was very clever, Kyuhyun mused as he sank into his reading chair. It was not his usual break time, so Zhou Mi’s raised eyebrow was to be expected. That and he was sure there was a sour expression on his face. This was uncomfortably like a date invitation, and that was so totally not what it was.
“I just want you to know that this invitation isn’t from me,” Kyuhyun said, leading with a disclaimer.
Zhou Mi tilted his head. “Okay?”
“Hankyung’s mother owns a restaurant across town, Chinese, authentic, and she’s making him bring Siwon. So I told him you should go too, if you were wanting the real thing anyway. I think they’re going next week. So. If you wanted to go, you could.”
Zhou Mi considered that a moment. “Are you going too?”
“Does that really make a difference?” he asked, suspicious.
“...A little. I don’t know Hankyung or Siwon very well, so wouldn’t it be weird for it to be just me?”
Well, if he put it that way. That would be awkward.
“I am going. Just so you know it’s not “them” and “us,” we’re just all going together. And you don’t know me very well, either.”
“I know more every day. You hum when you’re shelving.”
“I...what?”
“When I went out to get lunch yesterday, you were in the children’s section and you were humming. You sounded really good. I bet you sound amazing when you sing.”
He kind of wanted to brush the hair out of Zhou Mi’s eyes right then.
“I don’t know what you’d be able to know from me humming.”
“It was in tune... And your speaking voice is so nice... Maybe one day when you’re on your break, you could read to me instead.”
“That wouldn’t be much of a break, would it?”
Zhou Mi simply smiled.
“When are you bringing back that book you borrowed, anyway?”
“I brought that book back days ago, Kui Xian.”
“I didn’t know.”
“You wouldn’t let me tell you.”
He vaguely recalled Zhou Mi attempting to bring something up before Kyuhyun had turned to leave.
“Was Heechul happy to see you?”
Zhou Mi stared. “Heechul? Heechul was busy working and escorting his girlfriend. I didn’t go to visit him.”
Girlfriend? Heechul had a girlfriend?
“He is a flirt, but he is quite devoted,” Zhou Mi explained.
Well, that meant his question came out sounding a bit too far on the side of jealousy rather than curiosity. Even with Heechul gone he had been reluctant to return to the back room for his breaks. Perhaps he should have been grateful to Heechul. It was a week of the time Zhou Mi had with the books, a week that kept him from encouraging his way onto the slippery ground that was Zhou Mi’s presence. How much longer would he be there? A couple of weeks? A month? And when he had asked for that book...
“Will you come back on your break?” Zhou Mi asked, voice light but serious.
“I’ll be later than usual.”
“I’ll be here.”
He smiled at Kyuhyun, and this time it reached his eyes. They wouldn’t talk... He had discovered the danger of that. If Zhou Mi wanted to read to him, he would be content looking forward to that.
Hankyung was all but dancing in place at the counter waiting for him when he returned.
“So? Will he come?”
“Sounds like. Just let me know when you decide to go.”
“Sure. You can ask Siwon, though, when he comes in. Whenever is a good day for him.”
He peered over Hankyung’s shoulder and spotted Siwon himself, who peered in the wide windows and grinned before hurrying to the door.
“Ask him yourself.”
Hankyung bowed his head. “Not again.”
“Don’t be a moron. Hey, Siwon.”
“Hey...” Siwon turned with all sorts of hope toward Hankyung. “I’m going to pick up Yunjee at school. Will you come with me?”
Kyuhyun had to turn away to keep from laughing at Hankyung’s face. “I… sure.”
“Great! I’m going to steal Han Geng!” Siwon said to Kyuhyun.
Kyuhyun grinned, sobered. “Make sure you bring him back in one piece,” he said sternly.
He wondered that Siwon would laugh, but his hand was on Hankyung’s back and guiding him through the open door, and walking close, close enough for their arms to brush, as they went together down the street. Hankyung had at least wiped the “I’ve been struck by lightning” expression off of his face.
***
“So?” Kyuhyun demanded from behind the counter. Hankyung had returned just before he was ready to lock up.
“So?”
“So how was it?”
Hankyung sighed and pulled himself crossways into the chair, letting his head and legs drape languidly over the plush arms.
“I thought I told him to return you in one piece,” Kyuhyun said slyly. “And yet you’re about to ooze into twos and threes on the floor.”
“She held both our hands on the way back.”
“Aww.”
“We had ice cream…”
“In December?”
“She begged…”
“And used you shamelessly to appeal to Siwon, didn’t she?”
Hankyung’s head rose. “How did you know?”
“I have eyes in my head and more than two brain cells. Yours are unfortunately lost for the present. Since you’re going to tell me anyway…”
“He wiped my mouth with a napkin.”
Kyuhyun felt his stomach tremble. No, he didn’t want that with either of these two, but he wanted that… That easy familiarity, that wonderful closeness that spoke of affection. How did you find it? You could not put an ad in for it on the internet. It just happened. It was not magic, but it was close. And he didn’t have it.
“Mistaking you for another of his children already? You move fast.”
“Ha. Ha.”
“Here’s some advice since you’re melting all over my furniture: Next time he tries to wipe your mouth with paper, be sure to point to it and tell him you know something better you’d like there, like, you know, his.”
“Not in front of her!”
“Of course not… Just make sure you’re alone next time you’re being sloppy.”
“I don’t know what to do.”
“Of course you do,” Kyuhyun said, coming around so he could sit on the table and pat Hankyung’s shoulder. “You be yourself, just like you have been. He clearly hasn’t run away, so you must be doing something right. Seeing you’re here all but breaks his face already.”
He was pulled into a tight hug, and he squeezed back.
“And you should see your face, you know,” Kyuhyun said, poking him.
“I don’t make any weird expressions.”
“No, you just go a bit moony is all.”
“I’m scared out of my mind and so happy I could scream. I don’t know what that means.”
“Means it’s worth it.”
He didn’t bother telling him that for every ounce of fear Hankyung had, Siwon surely had two, because anyone who knew them or not could surely see the little girl’s attachment for Hankyung growing with every meeting. Hankyung knew, could surely see that. And he cared too much for Siwon, for Yunjee, for that not to be a concern of his as well. He wouldn’t want to hurt himself, but to hurt a child?
Zhou Mi’s quiet throat clearing from the door was as subtle as a slap to the face. He had clearly been waiting to leave for a while and was too polite to leave without saying goodbye.
“I… I’m sorry. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Hey, Zhou Mi,” Hankyung said, gripping Kyuhyun’s shoulder a little tighter as he sat up straight. “Kyuhyun is hungry. You should take him to get something.”
Kyuhyun stared at Hankyung. “I… what?”
“For calling me sloppy,” he whispered with a bright smile.
He didn’t know what it was. Their discussion? The fact that Zhou Mi wasn’t smiling in his face and asking him to go… Something made Kyuhyun turn toward Zhou Mi, the word “okay” nearly out of his mouth when Zhou Mi shook his head.
“Maybe another time. Good night, Han Geng. Kui Xian.”
And with a bob of his head, he was out the door.
It made the sting lessen, when he saw Hankyung’s face was as startled as he felt.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2009-03-14 05:23 am (UTC)haha, I really want to know how Hannie is going to resolve this whole issue. It'll be hard since he's IN DENIAL but NOT REALLY because he SEES IT and IT'S THERE but he JUST LIES TO HIMSELF and HE KNOWS IT and it BREAKS MY HEART. ;___; MAD TENSION.
Now Kyubaby and Mimi on the other hand... :| Just need to get together nao. haha XD One of these days, Zhou Mi is gonna be like, -LOOK I KNOW YOU WANT ME AND YOU SHOULD KNOW I WANT YOU SO JUSTCOMEANDGETIT GOSH.-
XD Or maybe that's just how it works out in my head. :D
-next chapter please!- :D
no subject
Date: 2009-03-14 05:24 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-03-14 07:47 am (UTC)Yes, it is a new brand of denial... You put it very well! I'll have to copy that down if someone ever asks what he's thinking, lol. *terribly hopeless romantic*
*pets Mimi* He's trying his best. XD *pokes stubborn Kyu for good measure* Obvious Kyu...
Next chapter should be up probably Sunday. :) :)